It is admittedly not easy to find the through line between a CIA black site and the city of Philadelphia, but one possibility could be the involuntary subjugation of people to hours and hours of children’s music repeated on a loop. Every afternoon, the Mister Softee truck hurtles down my street, ignoring its own admonition painted on the back to “SLOW! Watch for our children,” belching out diesel fumes and blasting the out-of-tune, horror-movie jingle, interrupting whatever anyone is doing within about a mile radius.

       Listen to the audio edition here:

In my corner of Northern Liberties, anywhere from two to three trucks hover at and around the Liberty Lands park for hours at a time when the weather permits, especially on weekends, blasting the jingle repeatedly. I live very close to the park, and despite wearing headphones or closing my windows, the sound is loud enough that it cuts through whatever task is at hand, including, in the case of my next-door neighbor, her newborn’s nap.

Let’s be clear about one thing upfront: If you want to buy cancer cones that look as if they were dipped in orange Chernobyl waste, I could not care less. If Mister Softee wants to silently park all day outside Liberty Lands, I could not care less. The issue is that while parked, the constant repetition of the jingle blasts into my house and my head and those of anyone else who lives nearby.

“We know that hearing sounds over and over can be very detrimental to the well-being and mental health of an individual,” says 1st District Philadelphia City Councilmember Mark Squilla, who represents Northern Liberties, among other River Wards.

“We have been receiving complaints from many areas for the noise associated with the ice-cream trucks,” he adds. “The problem seems to be when the truck stays at one location for a long time and keeps the music playing.”

An unrelenting jingle

New York City dealt with this exact problem back in 2005, when Mayor Michael Bloomberg and New York City Council passed sweeping noise legislation as a way of dealing with nearly 93,000 noise complaints in a year. The measures included requiring ice cream trucks to turn the music off while parked. Today, the trucks sit quietly all over New York street corners while selling their ultra-processed wares. A handy app allows fans to find the trucks. Everyone wins.

Here in Philadelphia, I wondered why we couldn’t do something similar. As I tested the waters locally for what I felt would be an unpopular position by slamming Softee, it turns out that other neighbors — especially parents — mostly agree with me.

“I plan to leave Liberty Lands if I’m there with my three kids around 4pm because that’s when the truck comes,” says a local dad* who works in sales. “How am I going to explain to a two-year-old that she can’t have ice cream before dinner?”

Anecdotally, about one in five people I spoke with doesn’t notice the noise. This category of resident generally does not live in range of where the trucks park. But for what seems like a whole lot of others, the noise is distracting and, frankly, maddening.

“We know that hearing sounds over and over can be very detrimental to the well-being and mental health of an individual.” — Philadelphia City Councilmember Mark Squilla.

One tech professional who lives at Brown and N. 5th said the truck parks outside his house and blasts the jingle for at least 30 minutes every day. “Someone asked me the other day how I’m doing and I said I’m in a bad mood because of the ice cream truck,” he says. “I tried to jam his [the truck’s] speakers, but they’re not on Bluetooth.”

A law student at Temple who is studying for the LSAT in August tells me: “I’m leaving the state soon so I can study. I can’t focus with that truck outside.” Another neighbor who lives around the corner from Liberty Lands advised I try Vipassana meditation to cope with the noise. A local friend says she now hears the truck’s jingle and “I’m triggered for you.” I’m sorry? You’re welcome? Welcome to hell?

I’ve attempted many times to come to an agreement with the drivers in my neighborhood. I’ve asked them to turn the jingle down (not even off!) when parked. I’ve pointed out that they park illegally, block the Liberty Lands entrance, idle for up to 30 minutes at a time, drive while texting and wearing earbuds and, it turns out, are operating at least one truck without a food safety certification. Given all that, I asked, is it too much to turn down the jingle when illegally parked?

“I don’t have to do anything,” the driver said and then turned the jingle up so loudly that the speakers strained. On the plus side, the noise almost drowned out the compressor, which sounds as if it’s about to give up and die. But back to the point: Was he right?

Mister no health inspection

I started looking through the online databases at the Department of Licenses and Inspections (L&I), which are publicly available. Mobile food vendors in Philadelphia need a business license and to pass an annual food safety certification in order to operate legally.

I cross-referenced all the available information and found that only two Mister Softee trucks meet the requirements. One of the two was the “I don’t have to do anything” driver who clearly was feeling my “Yes, you do” vibes and had just gotten his paperwork in order days before.

So how many trucks are out there, and how many are operating legally? “L&I has no way of estimating the number of Mister Softee trucks that hold food licenses,” says Kandyce Stukes, communications manager at the Department of Licenses and Inspections. “Many trucks are individually licensed and not listed as ‘Mister Softee,’” she adds. She did not provide a number to clarify the word “many.”

If a mobile food vendor fails a food safety certification, the vendor may get a Cease Operations Order and would have to pass another inspection in order to operate legally. Otherwise, the vendor risks being unable to renew their business license. With a Mister Softee truck costing up to $250,000, according to the franchise agreement, it seems risky to operate illegally.

“There is no enforcement plan specific to Mister Softee at this time.” L&I’s Kandyce Stukes.

But in the case of Mister Softee trucks, “the biggest challenge is that they are mobile,” says Stukes. “If a mobile food vendor is not motivated to ensure they have an active business license, there is not much that can be done.” It’s an honest assessment of the loopholes in enforcement that Softee franchisees appear to be exploiting.

Food-safety inspections, therefore, are easier for Softee trucks to evade than other food businesses because it’s so hard to catch them. In a city of dysfunction, the heroes of this story are the health inspectors. They are thorough, which may be why so few truck operators actually try to get certified. Here’s a sampling of some notes from various Mister Softee food safety inspection reports:

“Paper towel dispenser empty at the handwash sink. Soap was not available at the handwash sink. Cardboard observed being used as floor liner. Knife being stored in between crevice of table and handwash sink.” 5/17/23

“Wet and unclean food surface in the warewash area. No lidded trash can observed in either toilet room. Severely damaged and unsealed holes around wall surface on exterior of ware wash area.” 11/22/24

“Moist wiping cloths … not stored in sanitizing solution.” 4/14/25

“Due to imminent health hazards observed during this inspection, the establishment has been issued a Cease Operations Order and must discontinue food operations immediately. Food truck was found operating without Health Dept. approval. Operator was asked to close, but they served soft-serve after agreeing to close. Truck then left area.” 3/21/25

The inspector in the last case notes that the driver completely ignored the Cease Operations Order. “If inspectors notice a mobile food vendor that has been given a Cease Operations notice and has not passed a reinspection, all they can do is issue an additional Cease Operations notice and tell them to close until they pass inspection,” Stukes says.

In my neighborhood, Mister Softee is openly operating one truck without a food safety inspection after failing it in May 2023. The “I don’t have to do anything” driver, who is also the franchise owner’s son, is still illegally serving food to children outside Liberty Lands nearly every day with his second truck. It seems he doesn’t in fact have to do anything.

“There is no enforcement plan specific to Mister Softee at this time,” says Stukes.

Breakin’ the law

What about noise enforcement? I tried to reach Air Management Services, but after more than a dozen calls that went to voicemail, I gave up. Another agency official informally told me that someone from Air Management Services has to witness the violation of noise ordinances.

To enforce parking laws, the PPA would have to be at Liberty Lands when Mister Softee shows up. The police would need enough 911 nuisance calls for this to move up the list in priority, and then the officers would have to find the truck depending on how long a response took. One City official says the Mister Softee app, which is how to track the trucks in real time, “doesn’t work on a city phone.”

For the diehards who insist we all listen to the jingle over and over every day for months, YouTube offers an easy way to privately regress to childhood with a single click.

For everyone else, I’m with the official at L&I who told me that not only are the Mister Softee trucks a constant irritation, speeding off to evade inspectors and ignoring Cease Operations notices, but also because without inspections, there are no safety standards.

“You wouldn’t want to eat from these trucks if you could see inside them.”

*Some of the subjects interviewed requested anonymity.

Kristen Demilio is a writer and news editor based in Philadelphia.

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